10 Status Message of the Day

Probably the most awkward thing for Chinese parents is not explaining where babies come from, but rather, where they go.

Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.

wonders if someone driving a VW bug knows they are causing fistfights wherever they go.

Sometimes a person has to hit rock bottom to realize how low they can actually go.

it was all good just a week ago.

My biggest regret in life is eating whatever that was I found under my keyboard about 10 minutes ago.

That's nice, Titantic-lady. That diamond could have made generations of your family rich. But you go ahead and throw it in the ocean for some dude you showed your tits to 80 years ago.

According to WebMD my symptoms mean I died 3 years ago.

My neighbor put up his Christmas lights today. I bet he's pissed that I beat him to it. I put mine up three years ago.

How do you spell "clitoris"? I don't know but I had it on the tip of my tongue a moment ago.

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