10 Status Message of the Day

rejecting your reality and substituting his own.

rejects your reality and substitute my own.

I don't know why people say something is better if you work for it. Personally, I love being handed awesome sh*t through no effort of my own.

I'm the type of girl who can be so hurt but still look at you & smile. The type of girl who is willing to brighten your day even if I cant brighten my own.

With the price of printer ink so high, it would probably be more cost-effective to keep a giant aquarium full of squid and harvest my own.

I hope South Pole doesn't respond to increased North Pole activity with military exercises. Everybody settle down.

Who was the best comedian/stage performer in the Bible? ANS: Samson. He brought the house down.

I'm a much better fighter now that I have a blackbelt. I was f-kin hopeless when my trousers kept falling down.

Me and my missus got ready to cuddle up and watch our home made porno. I got up and pressed play, but unfortunately It was finished before I sat back down.

Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but sometimes it's good to see who cares enough to break them down.

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