10 Status Message of the Day

I made eye contact with someone in traffic and then didn't let them merge. I feel like a James Bond villain.

Signs that you have no life: when you have nothing better to do than complain.

already on the naughty list. Santa... I can explain.

It's a known fact that hopping on one leg after stubbing your toe helps to relieve the pain.

One good thing about music. When it hits you, you feel no pain.

blaming it on the rain.

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is just an oncoming train.

just fell in a fountain.

it just me or is Ed Hardy and Affliction in an all out war with each other to make the douchiest t-shirt possible. These things are like 95% rhinestones and glitter, these shirts scream I touch myself when I watch Brokeback Mountain.

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