10 Status Message of the Day

wants to point out that real men don't sparkle unless he just got back from the titty bar.

havingtrou blewithhis spacebar.

now understands, the reason he cant find his car keys is because he doesnt have a car.

It?s always awkward when you run into your ex with a car.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

One day you're going to look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.

Hurricanes are like women : when they come, they're wet and wild, but when they leave they take your house and car.

Motels....Because you and your hooker deserve better than the backseat of some car.

At night, every car that drives behind me automatically becomes a cop car.

Evidently that good samaritan bullsh*t doesn't apply when you help an old lady cross the street on the hood of your car.

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