10 Status Message of the Day

ESPN has announced that they are launching a 3D sports network. Industry analysts say this will absolutely revolutionize the way Americans don't watch soccer.

I'm a "person of interest"? Well,thank you very much, Officer.

By now, Colonel Sanders has killed more people prematurely than if he were an actual military officer.

I really hope cell phones aren't bad for us, but I would like the excuse: 'I can't talk right now. You're giving me cancer.'

If pink is for Breast cancer, brown should be for colon cancer.

we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.

Remember the bridge you drive over today was built by the lowest bidder.

can't stand Cows. They're way too dramatic. If it's not one thing, it's an udder.

Inventor of Segway drives it off cliff to his death. Bet he wishes he would have invented a hang glider.

They say humans evolved from apes but there are some people who make you reconsider.

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