10 Status Message of the Day

Beauty is in the Eye Of The Beer Holder.

What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?.....The cold shoulder.

How does every ethnic joke start? By looking over your shoulder.

how does every black joke start? by looking over your shoulder.

Either I made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.

wished parents would stop posting pics of their kids every day on facebook. We know how ugly your kid is with out the constant reminder.

frolicking in the meadow over yonder.

An Australian kiss is same thing as a French kiss, only down under.

when I was a lil kid I thought picking toys in the toy store was hard, now that I turn 21 picking alcohol in the liquor store is harder.

kissed a girl and I liked it. She, on the other hand; filed a restraining order.

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